Day 6

We all get scared...
I think I am.
I don't even know what I feel anymore.

I've been very prone to panic attacks (I guess you could call them that) recently. On Thursday the 17th a roach was on my ceiling fan and almost landed on me while I was laying in bed and I just had a horrible fit I was panicking the whole night. I was practically bawling too. Crying like crazy which is a little dumb but I can't help it. {I'm still/such a child...} I stayed up the whole time that night, I was shaking horribly and it hurt to breathe after a while. I think I have a deeply troubling phobia of insects especially roaches to a point where I will bother my parents at 3 A.M. and wake them up. (Yep. I'm a fail.) I'm still really paranoid. Now today I just can't control myself well I just started hyperventilating randomly throughout the day over small things. I've felt like throwing up and all this being out of my nerves is starting to give me nausea. I feel like I'm on overload.


-"They'll let you live the lie."

Shit... I gotta write some happy stuff, looking back on this it's a little mood depressing.
I dunno. Time will come yeah. Besides that everything is fine and stuff just trying to get involved in more extracurricular things to be a more well-rounded person. Yep, my life is nice and simple for now. I think I needed that.